Tuesday, January 25, 2011

If you're into the whole brevity thing...

I'm in a movie quoting mood, so get your video store knowledge flowing.

Video stores -- a relic of the past. What are they now? Places to buy video games. 
You and your silly World of Warcraft; I have no patience. 
Grown men playing games all day.

For God's sake, man, get off your couch and do something. 
Please let me opine obsessives. I'm sure Halo seems like pure heaven, 
but you smell--your couch has the imprint of your ass on it, your friends--friend
ok; your Mom's worried about you. Even the girl you have tied up in your basement 
since last year misses you. 
(actually she has Stockholm syndrome, but I say hey, use it to your advantage).

There's a world out there to be discovered, my massive ponytailed, mustard stained
T-shirt wearing pal. Think of all the crappy jobs you could do, people to humiliate you,
and the general sense of anger and rage you can feel towards others. 
Remember what a famous go- getting New Yorker once said--
"someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets".
Ah, words to live by.

Does anyone remember the story about the couple who let their kids starve 
because they were so wrapped in their video games? 
No, this isn't a joke--they literally forgot to feed them. What am I missing?
God, people are obsessed, aren't they--the Gamers, the Trekkies, Star Wars--yes,
I know the Sandpeople go from side to side; its just not that all encompassing . 
Besides, Anakin Skywalker wound up being a whiny fruit; such a let down.

Let me leave with this thought--has anyone out there noticed that
The Dude from the "The Big Lebowski" and Lance from ''Pulp Fiction'' 
look eerily similar? I'll just put it out there; discuss, debate.

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